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I left the house without my key this morning, unbeknownst to me. We never lock the door unless all of us will be gone at the same time, the neighborhood just never rated much caution in that area. Church had a really nice outreach project, a free garage sale and cookout. Lots of fun. Then I get home and...oops, was wearing shorts this a.m., decided to switch to jeans before leaving. Lovely. So I get to sleep out in the barn again. Luckily I got picked up some clothes this morning, can wear them to church tonight.
The worst part is the embarrassment, both in front of my family if they find out--mom & sis are out of town, at an art fair, bro is always out on Sat. night with friends doing gaming night (from weird war strategy games to Magic cards). Oh, family and church. But that's the way it goes, more likely to tell churchies than immediate family. He is usually out till 1 in the a.m., maybe even later. Well, I can sleep in the barn, still have a sheet out there. There used to be a spare key in the backyard, but I didn't look too hard, I really don't think it's there anymore. Plenty of daylight so I can look when I get home from church.
Just...Duh. And the slight worry bro won't be home till tomorrow afternoon. I do have a sheet and light and my journal for out in the barn, and a free book from the free garage sale. There is a White Castle up the street, so if I get desperate for a potty.... Ugh, I won't be able to brush my teeth. But there will possibly be food at church.
I feel like I somehow planned this, the way I have felt at various times when things have gone very very very wrong in my life. Like when I got hit by a car, and when I got kicked out of the house for the first time and had to live in the barn. Only this time it's just two days of misfortune and disaster at the most.
What was I thinking? That somehow my brother would be there all weekend, because that's where I would be. What was I thinking? I seriously don't know. I had the key in hand this a.m., just could not get myself to say to myself--be sure and have this or you'll be stone out of luck for the night. I seriously think I did this to myself for some reason, like I was meant to spend more time in the barn.
I noticed there was a leak somewhere, something was making the floor wet. Or it's an old oil stain. I hope that's it, I don't want to deal with a leak.
Arrr-what was I thinking?
The worst part is the embarrassment, both in front of my family if they find out--mom & sis are out of town, at an art fair, bro is always out on Sat. night with friends doing gaming night (from weird war strategy games to Magic cards). Oh, family and church. But that's the way it goes, more likely to tell churchies than immediate family. He is usually out till 1 in the a.m., maybe even later. Well, I can sleep in the barn, still have a sheet out there. There used to be a spare key in the backyard, but I didn't look too hard, I really don't think it's there anymore. Plenty of daylight so I can look when I get home from church.
Just...Duh. And the slight worry bro won't be home till tomorrow afternoon. I do have a sheet and light and my journal for out in the barn, and a free book from the free garage sale. There is a White Castle up the street, so if I get desperate for a potty.... Ugh, I won't be able to brush my teeth. But there will possibly be food at church.
I feel like I somehow planned this, the way I have felt at various times when things have gone very very very wrong in my life. Like when I got hit by a car, and when I got kicked out of the house for the first time and had to live in the barn. Only this time it's just two days of misfortune and disaster at the most.
What was I thinking? That somehow my brother would be there all weekend, because that's where I would be. What was I thinking? I seriously don't know. I had the key in hand this a.m., just could not get myself to say to myself--be sure and have this or you'll be stone out of luck for the night. I seriously think I did this to myself for some reason, like I was meant to spend more time in the barn.
I noticed there was a leak somewhere, something was making the floor wet. Or it's an old oil stain. I hope that's it, I don't want to deal with a leak.
Arrr-what was I thinking?
